she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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