Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
