It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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