Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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