The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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