Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
