So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
