I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
wrigley field is MILF paradise
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
