brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
