My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
