You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
