wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
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