I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
