I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Randomize
