A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
why is half of my head shaved?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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