WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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