69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
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