What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize