these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize
