Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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