You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
