have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
