she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize
