i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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