well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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