I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Randomize
