Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
