Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
