Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize