you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
