should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
