Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
