you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
