yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
