i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
