I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
