sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
