Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
