Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize