Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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