Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
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