im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
