he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
