Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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