I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Randomize
