I wish I could punch you in the face.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Randomize