Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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