So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
