its not stalking. its research.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
My ATM looks so different sober.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
