just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize